Parenting

Why is it that teenagers seem to think that saying I'm sorry is the great eraser for moral and intellectual errors of judgement? Why is it that the concept of earning forgiveness in order to restore what Why is it that you need to take a course to have a driver's license, be tested, and only receive a whole license after experience, yet there is no such manual or testing period or learning period when you become a parent? It's a strange thing in many ways how a child can enrich your life, even though a recent study on happiness amongst Canadians discovered that having children definitely has negative affect on your happiness factor. Your children can make your heart, head and chest swell with pride and the knowledge that the world is in good hands with the next generation. At least those are the good moments. Then there are the others.
Recently I experienced one of those other times. It's quite something to have your opinion of maturity, understanding, and trust dashed in a moment of reckless stupidity. Why is it that teenagers cannot, no matter how much you talk, plead and beg, grasp the concept of wider repercussions and consequences for themselves and others because of their actions has been taken away from them is the primary modes opperandi for this group? Why can't they understand that forgiveness isn't something that you can earn by accomplishing a certain number of tasks, but is rather something that you demonstrate the ability to receive from the people you have hurt? Why is it that teenagers don't understand that their actions can and do break sacred trusts that have been given and earned over time and not something that can be quickly or easily "fixed" in a non time intensive manner? Once again trust is something that you have to demonstrate being able to handle and receive. It is not deserved or a right in any way. Why is it that I feel hurt, angry, frustrated, and let down - when in all reality no one was physically hurt and the damage done has more to do with character and reputation than anything else?
As you can probably guess there was an incident with my son that is causing this blog and reflection. It was recent and I'm still very raw from the experience and yet even now I find myself wondering will I be able to trust him again in the same way I did before? Will I be able to look at him with the same degree of pride and wonderment at his potentiality? Will I be able to forgive - yes I'm sure with time I will, yet I also equally certain that I will never forget. My relationship with him has been deeply bruised - not broken, after all he's my son and I will love him with all my heart, mind and soul as long as I have breath.